Setting Boundaries

Dear Friends, 

Are you able to set firm boundaries with other people?  Do you feel that you are responsible for other people’s happiness?  Maybe you feel the need to “fix” people and control outcomes.  Do you feel like a doormat for others?  I’ve heard it said that we will never allow someone else to treat us worse than we treat ourselves. This approach to life can be a full-time job, not to mention tiring. It takes a lot of energy to play God.  That may sound a little harsh, but I’m being serious.

 Whenever I get in “GOD” mode, I worry about what will happen tomorrow, I worry about what my kids are eating or aren’t eating and should be, I worry that I’m not doing a good enough job for people, I worry that I’m not a good enough wife or Mother, not sexy enough, not fun or playful or patient enough.  You name it.  The name of the game is Worry with a capital W.  When I’m on my worry pot, I am actually arrogant because I must think that my worrying will accomplish something or at least control those around me a little bit more. Otherwise, why would I do it? Sadly, it never serves any useful purpose.  It lowers my vibration, my energy, and I get less and less done.  

I’m not suggesting that you don’t take your feelings or concerns seriously.  They are trying to tell you to take some sort of action, even if that means doing nothing.  Just relaxing.  You can begin to turn things around by listening to your intuition and tapping on how you feel. Once you start to gain self-respect and self-esteem, it’s important that you protect this new found confidence and serenity.  My motto is that I will give to people until I start to resent my giving. 

If I can’t give freely, it will hurt the other person more than help him/her.  Further, it will hurt me too as evidenced by this quote:  “Resentment is like drinking poison and hoping that the  other person dies.”   A boundary is an invisible line that we draw in the sand.  We must learn to say NO to people’s requests for our time and not be the martyr or the people-pleaser.  Our first priority is to please ourselves so that we can be the best person for others.  We will be more emotionally available and present to the moment.  Another example of setting a boundary is not tolerating or accepting poor treatment such as physical or verbal abuse from another.    

We can simply and firmly state, “I don’t appreciate how you’re treating me, and I am no longer willing to tolerate it.  When you want to talk to me or interact with me respectfully, let me know.”   

PS:  If you’re really serious about creating your most magnificent life, click on the attached to see if you qualify for a discovery session: http://www.harmonyharbor.com/discovery-session

PSS:  Do you have friends and family that are also interested in creating their own destinies of joy and freedom?  Send them to: http://www.harmonyharbor.com/news-register

Peace & Blessings,   


Angie Monko, 
314-422-6520   

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