Do you throw the baby out with the bathwater, as the
Another way to say this is do you have all or nothing
I believe this has been one of my character defects ever
since I started dieting when I was 10 years old. My Grandma
and I would count our calories all week, go get weighed in
at Slim Talk on a Monday evening, and then go get a Big Mac,
regardless of what the scale said.
I guess this was sort of a reward system for us, which is a
good thing. What wasn't so good was when we'd "mess up"
on our diet and then figure, "Well I've blown it now! I might
as well pig out."
Another way I've seen my life through black and white
lenses is by how people treat me.
Have you ever done this? 99 friends and family treat you
like a worthy Queen or King and you are skeptical that they
are "just trying to be nice," but one person criticizes or judges
you harshly and you instantly BELIEVE THEM.
You see, we Highly Sensitive People" (HSP) are very prone to taking
responsibility for everyone else. If someone reacts with anger
to something we say or do, we take it personally.
I really thought that everyone reacted this way to other
people's "stuff," their emotions, their behaviors toward us,
how we felt.
But what I'm learning is that 80% of the population is not
nearly as sensitive as HSP's. They can just plow through
the world, all go go go.
They don't need or even care if their house or environment
looks a certain way. They don't really concern themselves that
much what others think of them.
They don't reflect nearly as much on their thoughts and feelings
as we HSP's. They can go all day and then be ready to go
to parties/social events at night.
This is NOT me. I honor that I have a differently wired
nervous system, and my Higher Self tells me I need to STOP
and SLOW DOWN. I just don't always listen.
The conflict occurs because another one of our tendencies
is to REALLY care what others think. If that weren't the case,
I could easily say NO when someone asked something of me.
What's this got to do with throwing the baby out with the
bathwater, you might ask. Go back to my story of how we
believe the one negative input over the 99 positive ones.
As HSP's we tend to wear our heart on our sleeves and
we can be easily hurt. We believe that one criticism even
though it's just one hater's opinion of us.
Or if someone ignores us, we assume it's because WE
did something wrong. What if they just want to avoid conflict
If you hear yourself in this dialog, then register today
for the next Frontier to Your Freedom class on Thursday,
October 11th from 6-8pm.