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Boo! What do you fear most?

Angie Monko - Tuesday, August 15, 2017
Boo! What do you fear most? Perhaps you have noticed 
some of the fear going on in our world. 

The latest was the incident in Charlottesville, VA on Friday,
8/11, where hundreds of marchers descended on the 
University of Virginia, carrying torches and yelling slogans
"white lives matter" and "blood and soil."

Protests turned violent as white supremacists clashed with
counter demonstrators, and a car ploughed into a crowd of
anti-racist and anti-fascist demonstrators.

Societal fears aside, personally, are you are afraid of getting
older, losing some of your mobility and freedom? And/or are you 
afraid of losing your looks, youth and vitality?  Many of us don't
feel as valuable if we're not as pretty or young or fit. What are 

some of your other fears?

What do the two topics have in common? The first is the fear
that this nation is plagued with. The second are the fears that 
we as individuals experience. How are they connected and to 
what extent?

According to James Baldwin in a recent article on 
brainpickings.org, "Indeed, if the great humanistic philosopher
and psychologist, Erich Fromm, was correct, as I believe he
was, in asserting that self-love is the foundation of a sane
society, our responsibility to ourselves--and to our lives--
is really a responsibility to one another: to know our interiority
intimately and hold our darkest sides up to the light of 
awareness. But part of our human folly is that we do this far
less readily than we shine the scorching beam of blameful
attention on the darkness of others." 

If you are coming to know me at all, you realize that I'm not
sitting on a perch of self-righteousness. I, like you, have done 
my fair share of blaming and finger pointing.

I really want to encourage each of us to look within and see
how we're living in fear, and how is this adversely affecting
the world around us. You may recall one of my new favorite
phrases, "I choose to feel my pain rather than cause it!"

For example, I know I'm over-scheduled right now, and I tend
to get a little frantic and stressed when that's the case. I will
take my fear of not being able to get everything done out on
others, by being impatient, snappy, rude.

Today is one of those days.  So what I'm trying to do, to the
best of my ability, is witness my rushing.  And I'm being more
cautious with my words and my pacing of them.  Even though
I may feel rushed on the inside, I CAN slow myself down and
not spread this hyper energy to others.

When I complain about my busy-ness and look for sympathy,
I'm keeping myself stuck in a rut of victimization (feel sorry
for me please!).  I especially do this around my husband. It 
serves me to feel bad for myself because I don't have to take
responsibility and find a solution.

I really don't want to do this anymore. I want to grow up! I 
don't want to remain unaware, a victim to my habits of thought,
substance, and behavior. The below quote says this beautifully.

"Echoing Bruce Lee's assertion that 'to become different from
what we are, we must have some awareness of what we are,' 
James Baldwin turns his critical yet un-cynical intellect toward 
our capacity for self-transformation--the most difficult and rewarding
of our inner resources comprising our collective potentiality:

It is perfectly possible — indeed, it is far from uncommon — to go
to bed one night, or wake up one morning, or simply walk through 
a door one has known all one’s life, and discover, between inhaling
and exhaling, that the self one has sewn together with such effort 
is all dirty rags, is unusable, is gone: and out of what raw material 
will one build a self again? The lives of men — and, therefore, of 
nations — to an extent literally unimaginable, depend on how vividly
this question lives in the mind. It is a question which can paralyze the
mind, of course; but if the question does not live in the mind, then 
one is simply condemned to eternal youth, which is a synonym for
corruption."

I truly believe peace in our country will begin in each of our own
minds.  Please share what you think by commenting on this blog.

How can peace start with you?


Peace out,


Angie Monko



Comments
Dr. Dorine Kramer commented on 16-Aug-2017 12:41 AM
This is a beautiful post, Angie. I love the quote at the end. Where is it from? The word-picture is sticking in my mind, and reminds me so much of my experience as an empty-nester. It is certainly a challenge to recreate oneself when the raw material is so encumbered by beliefs, expectations, and interpretations, that it becomes difficult to tease out what your true, energetically clear self comprises. "It is perfectly possible — indeed, it is far from uncommon — to go to bed one night, or wake up one morning, or simply walk through  a door one has known all one’s life, and discover, between inhaling and exhaling, that the self one has sewn together with such effort  is all dirty rags, is unusable, is gone: and out of what raw material  will one build a self again?" This speaks to so many possibilities for joy and fear. --------Hello, Dorine, Thanks for your comment! The quote is from James Baldwin of Brainpickings.org whom I'd quoted earlier in the post. Yes, at times of transition in our lives, our identity begins to be shaken up...where we re-evaluate who we are, what we've done, and what the next phase of life will be. Exciting and scary at the same time...


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